Alone on the Edge
So… you arrived at your new job overseas, and everything is great. You know the language, you’re getting things done at work, there are no misunderstandings or friction on your team, and you are working toward the priorities set for you. The family is happy and there is no stress at all. Does this sound like a fantasy? It may be a recurring fantasy for people who work and live abroad for the first time or the fifth time, the transition is not easy. Not only do you have a new job, but you are also moving to a new house, a new culture, a new language, and possibly a new company or management level as well. And, if things don’t go well, the whole family has to uproot itself and go back to your home country, because you can’t stay without the visa sponsorship. So, no pressure.
As someone newly arrived in your new country/job/company, there are so many things you don’t know, and don’t even know to ask. It’s especially awkward if you are the head of an office, so you won’t see your boss on a daily basis. You are separated from your staff by hierarchy and culture. They say it’s lonely at the top. In this position you are at the top and far from the center. It’s easy to feel like you are on the edge. All alone.
It may not be possible to avoid feeling disoriented and out of place when you arrive at an overseas assignment, but it is possible to reduce isolation and avoid some common mistakes of managers who come into a new culture or a new organization. Getting on board and up to speed quickly will help reduce the unsettled feeling. The first step here is a little scary: allow yourself to be vulnerable.
It’s tempting to try to demonstrate your experience and expertise in a new position, but you will go farther faster if you start out by admitting what you don’t know.
Let your boss know you may check in once a week or so for the first couple of months until you are up to speed. You will likely discuss expectations and priorities in your first conversation. You will need to clarify early and often until you are sure you’re on the right track.
Let your staff know that you are on a learning curve. This means you will ask a lot of questions, accompany them to meetings they would normally attend on their own, and be involved at a lower level in the first weeks you will later. Let them know that you will need their feedback, even if you don’t like it. In some places you may need to say this more than once. You may need to ask specifically for each meeting or project for honest feedback, and tell them it’s important to help you move more quickly along the learning curve. It may be more difficult to get direct feedback in some cultures than others. And here’s the hard part: Don’t act defensive when the feedback comes. Thank them for the feedback, and admit it if you’re surprised or disappointed, but quickly get to the “what can I do better?” part of the conversation.
Find somebody who can be your cultural mentor. This could be an assistant or a colleague, or anyone who works with you who can be trusted to let you know when you’re talking too loudly, forgetting to greet everyone, or any of the other many faux pas you can and will make. If you haven’t established any relationships yet, it’s best to choose someone who doesn’t view you as a competitor. It should be someone who has an interest in your success.
Being truly open to learning how things are done, accepting and acting on feedback, and accepting the differences in your new culture will go a long way toward developing good relationships with your team, your boss, and colleagues. Your vulnerability will foster a sense of trust, which will be important to build an effective team ready to identify new goals. Being effective at reaching goals with your team will bring you away from “the edge.”
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